My burnout story

Burnout hit me in a way I never saw coming.

I had been living in survival mode for years. Juggling two businesses, a baby, a toddler, teenagers, a home that never stops, clients who need me, and a brain that had no off switch.

Every day felt like a marathon. And instead of resting at the finish line, I just kept running straight into the next one.

I just kept on pushing, with no idea that i was about to crash.

When my body said no

Then one night, I thought i was having a heart attack!

My heart was racing so fast that I genuinely thought I was having a heart attack. It wouldn’t slow down. I couldn’t breathe and I was cold sweaty!! Panic set in.

The paramedics came, but because it was Covid, they didnt want to take me into hospital, knowing I was feeding my baby and would probably catch it and end up stuck in there!

They sat with me on my bedroom floor for four hours. Four hours of being taught how to breathe. How to calm myself down again.

It was not a heart attack.  Although my heart WAS beating at over 200 beats per minute, even they agreed that was quite impressive!

They said it was stress, anxiety and a full blown burnout!  Worst is, I didn’t really feel stressed! knacered yes, stressed, not really. 

After the crash

After that, I spent seven days in bed.

Barely moving. Barely functioning. Completely empty.

I lost all interest in life, my kids, food!  I only got up to go to the toilet, and my husband would bring up the baby for me to feed her and take her back down again.  I was a shell!

What burnout actually looks like

Burnout isn’t always dramatic from the outside.

For me, it didn’t look like quitting everything or falling apart publicly. It was  silent and it snuck up on me.  My body just decided one day that, that was enough. For years i had been holding things together, showing up, Getting things done.

That experience changed how I see work, pressure, and self care forever.

Learning how to come back into my body

Recovery wasn’t quick.  For months after my heart would skip beats and then race, making my body do an internal somersault. 

I learnt how to meditate, how to train my brain to switch off at night time, and I finally gave myself rest!  Weekends off and walks in the hills. 

And then there were the small things. The everyday things.

Giving myself time in the morning and in the evening that was just for me. 

Standing at the sink, washing my face slowly, taking a few minutes to actually breathe. Massaging my skin. Letting the smell of the products ground me back into my body when my head wanted to run away with itself.

That’s where Tropic came in for me.

Not as makeup. Not as skincare. But as a pause. A ritual. A reason to stop twice a day and remind myself that I needed time with myself.

The smells. The textures. The familiarity of it. It helped calm my nervous system in a way I didn’t even realise I needed at the time.

Those few minutes in the morning and evening became bookends to my day. No matter how busy things were, I always had that time. Time that belonged to me.

Burnout taught me that pushing through isn’t strength. Listening is.

And now, when I feel knackered, like I just want to hide, I listen and I give myself time off.

If you have burnout stories, I would love to hear them. Pop me an email and let me hear them.